I’m dedicating today’s blog post to Father’s Day, in memory of my dad, Ed.

I want you to consider the ways in which your own father has inspired you or influenced you in your life. For me, fatherhood represents wisdom and strength; the wisdom of experience that can be passed down from father to son or daughter, and the strength to overcome adversity.

I’m certain that all of us have had to overcome difficulties in our lives. At some point we have all needed to dig deep and find that inner strength to help us survive tough times. Can you think of an example of a challenging experience like that? Do you remember what inspired you or gave you the fortitude to make it through?

I find my own life is full of challenges… It’s not easy to balance being a good father, supportive husband, considerate son, thriving business owner, diligent student, and still find time to train, sleep, and eat well. Regardless of how time-consuming and engaging my personal and business projects can become, my priority is still to spend quality time with my wife and daughter. Needless to say, being a busy dad can be as exhausting as it is rewarding; I’m sure the other dads reading this can back me up on that!

To keep things in perspective it’s important to take a step back and realize how blessed I am to be “busy” with what I love: my family, my business, my education, exercise, self-improvement, etc. This helps me understand that the time and energy invested now is building a strong foundation for our future. In this way I begin to see most of the “challenges” as opportunities. It all has to do with what you focus on… when you approach life with an attitude of gratitude it will feel like a blessing to be busy.

In contrast, I can remember some truly difficult experiences from my past. One in particular stands out; I don’t think many people know this story. I had my first “life and death” experience when I was 17 years old, as a passenger in a major car accident.  As our vehicle was traveling over 100 km per hour on the highway, a tire blew out and it rolled three times into the median ditch. I was catapulted through the window and thrown about 20 feet from the car, landing in the ditch (thankfully not into traffic!).

When I landed I felt a sharp pain in my lower back and knew instantly it wasn’t good. My friend Matt, who was the driver, saw me lying motionless in the ditch and assumed I was dead. I can’t imagine how he must have felt. He encouraged me to stay still until the paramedics arrived, which didn’t take long. They threw a neck collar on me and strapped me to a back-board before loading me up into the ambulance and taking me to the nearest hospital for X-rays. I was told soon after that I had suffered 3 fractured lumbar vertebrae (spinal compression fractures). The doctor said it was likely because I had been lifting weights regularly that I had not suffered any serious nerve damage. 

After several days lying on my back in a hospital bed, high on morphine, followed by a couple of weeks of bed-rest at the hospital I was permitted to walk again wearing a supportive corset around my midsection. I was told avoid lifting heavy weights ever again, and to stay away from the deadlift in particular. Well, to me it didn’t make sense to me that the same training which had protected me from serious injury was now considered “bad”. So I learned as much as I could about strength training and post-injury fitness, and as soon as I was able I began lifting even heavier! Today I’m happy to say the deadlift is one of my strongest exercises.

Why am I telling you all of this? During every challenge I’ve encountered or whenever I feel overwhelmed, I think about those people in my life who have inspired me. I find that this motivates me to meet the tough times head on and come out on top. For me, the most influential person in my life was my father. My dad, Edward, was a giant of a man, standing 6’5″ tall, with broad shoulders and sporting a full beard. He was a leader, an activist, a philosopher, and a family man. It’s no exaggeration when I say he was the greatest man I ever personally knew.

When he passed away from cancer at the young age of 46 it turned my world upside down. But even while he was fighting cancer, I never heard him complain. There are two things he said that I will always remember:

  • “Everything happens for a reason; that doesn’t mean you’re going to like it.”

  • “The way to become immortal is to positively influence the lives of other people. Your actions will live on in others.”

He taught me that there is a lesson or an opportunity for growth in everything that happens to you, both good and bad. I also learned that to lead a fulfilling life one needs to have a purpose that includes helping others. Obviously these memories carry a lot of emotional charge for me, but they have also shaped who I am today, and it helps to look back and realize where you draw your inner strength from. I hope reading this has helped you reflect on who inspires you and what strengthens you to overcome the obstacles you face. I’d love to hear your father’s day story… feel free to comment below.

I’ll leave you with this video where Rocky shares a little of his philosophy of life with his son. This is one of my favorite Father to Son speeches: